Schizophrenia and learning to code

Hi all!

I tried to learn to code several times in my life but quited every time after few months. I was also ill my whole life, in my early 20s I was diagnosed with depresion and the illness transformed to schizophrenia. Latest hospitalization was 4 monhs ago and psychiatrist has given me same medication as before which doesn’t fit me so quited with meds. I also wacthed movie “Take These Broken Wings” and realised that I don’t need those meds but still my brain doesn’t work as before.

My current situation isn’t good. I live above restaurant in a small room and can’t work any serious job. I deliver for Glovo which is delivery service from Spain. The pay isn’t good and it is tough to be on bicycle more then 5 hours a day. I used to drive Uber which was easier job and I could work for 10 hours a day but I don’t have driving licence anymore. I’m 38 year old and I’m not in good relationship with my familly because they think I got my illness from weed. They placed me in commune for rehabilitation from weed after hospital and I just couldn’t take it. The illness got worse and I left and returned to hospital for two weeks when my relative gave me this room to live in. The conditions are bad but at least I have place to sleep, eat, wifi and a computer so I can learn. Most of the time I’m woried about my future because I don’t see much options for me. Hopefully I will learn to code and find a better job so I can move to a nicer place.

All I need is your support and love.

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You can learn a lot from the freecodecamp community because there is almost always someone that can help you.
You can start learning the basics of web development with khan academy:


then you can come over here and learn with freecodecamp. At least that’s how I started.

Don’t quit. Keep on going and you will eventually meet your goal.
You can do this. Keep coding.

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Hola bresha, you are in a great community now! Try not to focus on the past, because… it’s past. I wish you all the best and don’t give up. If you are feeling like quitting at some point, come back here and tell us what’s not working and the FCC community will figure it out. We are all learning all the time, and when things get complicated, there’s always someone who has been there before and perhaps will explain it in a way that is perfect for you to make sense. Good luck! and smile!

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Hi bresha, you are in for a treat! this is a great journey!! Do not give up. yes, sure… there will be hard days ahead, 100% you won’t be able to skip them, but you need to know that in advance so it’s not a big deal. you just try again tomorrow with a same energy you did before. you will be fine. And we are all here for you.
I, just like you, was diagnosed with depression. I, just like you, had crappy jobs. dont look back, this is a great career
cheers

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I am also battling bipolar depression, you are not alone, keep going and do not give up!

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Hi Elineea!
Thank you for reply.
Do you have problems with memory? With concentration? With motivation? I have problems with all three.

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Hi, I’m also on flexbox here on fcc. It would be great to exchange information. Hit me up with pm

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Hello. I have problems with motivation and yes concentration. But keep going if you practice daily you will get used to it it becomes a habit!

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Hi there,

I have bouts of depression too and I can’t imagine how difficult it is for someone who has that plus schizophrenia.

This is a nice and welcoming community so feel free to ask for help if you need anything.

Most of the time I’m woried about my future because I don’t see much options for me. Hopefully I will learn to code and find a better job so I can move to a nicer place.

One thing I learned about myself when I was learning programming while being depressed at the same time is it’s easy to envision a future hopeful scenario and then, not taking my time with the learning process because I want to be freed of the suffering ASAP. I rush things and set unrealistic goals.

The dream is not the problem because it’s definitely achievable. The problem is the expectation I set for myself doesn’t align well with my situation and capabilities at the time. In the end, I didn’t reach my goals and made my situation worse.

I wrote this post on desperation as a result of that experience.

Anyhow, welcome and I hope you enjoy your stay here.

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Hi,

thank you for reply! I read your post on desperation and I agree, I tried to learn to program several times in my life and every time I wanted to do things to fast and that made me quit every time so now I won’t set any goals, I’ll just try to work.

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I’m glad that you agreed with the post.

now I won’t set any goals, I’ll just try to work.

It’s okay to set goals. In fact, I think it’s always a good idea to set goals but just make sure it’s something that’s challenging but still doable. Then again, if not having a goal helps you to move forward, by all means do what works for you.

From my experience of depression, to escape from it all, it’s easy to say “yup, this time, I’ll code 8 hours a day and become a web developer once and for all”.

But then when I fail, I became more and more demotivated.

So, my current method of setting goals is fairly simple: I’ll start with 30 minutes per day. If I can stick to that and manage my mental issues at the same time, I’ll increase it by another 30 minutes. Repeat ad nauseam.

Hopefully that helps. I wish you the best of luck. You can do this.

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Never give up your struggle, I believe if you have will, you will eventually succeed, also I would suggest you to focus and follow blogs of various software developments companies like DCS, GoodCore software etc, this would definitely help you gain an edge, but such companies share practical insights which are very beneficial for new developers. Thanks

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Hi Bresha. Minneapolis MN here, far away but not too different. This will def take some work, senor, but work is easy, the starting is the hard part. The past is over. We all have chapters in our life. The night is always darkest before the dawn. That chapter of your life was painful, but Im telling you now, its not anymore. This is your Chapter 2. Roll your sleeves up son! Dont think of yesterday or tomorrow, look around you, if that tiny room is what you want youll do nothing, but if you want to leave, youll get to work. Today. Today is all that has ever mattered. God bless.

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